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Thoughts on Die Hard

I was asked to watch this movie, and I had some thoughts. So I’m sharing them with you. Enjoy.

Is this what happens at office parties in the 80s? I’ve been to some office parties and there were no drugs and no sex in the bathrooms.

That is some pathetic chest hair.

Is this really the kind of product placement Ford wants?

What’s with the guy watching the elevators? Did he have a real purpose?

He looks better as Snape.

I would not want to be barefoot in a construction zone.

Guided missiles? What the heck does this company do?

Did he bet on whether the guy was stupid enough to get shot? Or if the boss would actually kill him.

Those cops got awful close, awful fast, is the station next door?

Finds the bad guy and the first thing he does is throw his gun away? What?!

If he was gonna kill him, wouldn’t it have been easier to just shoot him?

Take his socks! For the love if God, take his socks.

Who wears sunglasses in their DL picture?

A Santa hat does not make this a Christmas movie.

Why is he not looking up? What if you run into something. LOOK UP! LOOK UP!

Does he only play cops? He doesn’t seem like the traditional casting for that.

He can’t hear the machine guns? See the sparks?

That was loud and useless.

This seems like a bad idea. closes eyes

Why would he not just lay there quietly, making no noise and no light. Dumb. Dumb. Dumb.

Did he change his shirt?

A cop would think it’s normal for a security guard to be watching a game? Computers don’t make crank phone calls.

For the love. Driving backwards with no idea where you are going seems like a bad idea.

I don’t know who Roy Rogers is.

The news station seems ….

The police have a semi truck?

That gun shot on his forehead went away super fast.

Now the limo guy wakes up? Seriously.

This chief sounds stupid.

Didn’t they cut the security cameras and destroy the computers? How is it working now?

The limo driver should be hiding in the trunk. How was he planning on driving that guy anywhere with all that booze?

I see all the Christmas references, but this movie was released in July – kinda sending some mixed messages here.

Now they don’t even listen to the chief? Who’s running this operation.

They are handling those explosives very Willy-nilly. Making me nervous.

Is he trying to knock the building down? He knows his wife is in that building right?

More cocaine? This guy is stupid. I hope they shoot him.

Alan Rickman is a national treasure. Not our nation, unfortunately, but still.

A name is not a delivery. So fucking stupid. He’s gonna get the wife killed.

What did I say. Idiot.

They just pulled this author out of his bed at whatever fucking time it is?

My thoughts exactly Carl, my thoughts exactly.

Why would he set his gun down? Never ever set your gun down.

Omg. Sucker.

How does he not recognize his voice? Idiot. IDIOT.

His feet are so gross. Should have stole the socks.

WHY WOULD YOU GIVE AWAY YOUR GUN. ALL IDIOTS. EVERY LAST ONE OF THEM.

Gross. I did not need to see knee caps exploding. Thank you.

Gross. Gross. Gross.

How did they not find the blood trail from his feet?

How many people did he kill? He couldn’t check any of their shoes?

Joe on the street says to shut the power off and they do??

Then again, this is Easter music.

How they gonna ruin an action movie with this sappy ass shit.

Whose ducking idea was if to put those kids on television. Everyone in this movie is stupid as fuck.

Fucking gross.

This FBI guy is… problematic.

Now is bad time to decide he’s scared of heights

Ho. ly. shit. The helicopter was obviously too close.

An ambulance? Genius. I know they are the bad guys but still. I like it.

Way to go argyle!

The laughing is weird.

No way they get down before all the papers do. Bull shit.

I hope she punches him. YES. You go lady.

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